Several weeks ago, I reviewed a certain album from the Ontario Lottery Corporation that came to us from my good friend Jeff in Canada at his website.
Buried in my stack of CDs was the OTHER album by the Ontario Lottery Corporation! Released in 1982, these sixteen tracks were possibly if not probably used for radio & TV commercials for the Ontario Lottery.
The first album was very straight laced - harmonized singing, lush orchestra, well produced, occasionally some of the strangest lyrics you'll ever hear, and very homogenized. It's worth a listen and a chuckle.
This second album has these elements and a little bit more. The camp factor on this album is ten times higher than the first album - making this one of the best finds of the year in my book!
Here's a track by track review:
1.) Christmas Is For Children
There was a song on the first album with the exact title. Coincidence? This one isn't oversung though!
2.) Whenever It Snows
"Whenever it snows, I wiggle my toes, I can hardly wait to get out my skates..." Yep, she's Canadian!
3.) Santa's Gotta New Bag
They try SOOO hard to make this a James Brown tune and by 10 seconds in, you're laughing hysterically!
4.) A Change Of Heart
Christmas singers croon to a Scrooge-like character and guess what happens by the end of the song?
5.) Santa's Favourite Day
The number of "good/bad" lyrics in this one here are too many to type. My jaws are hurting from laffin...
6.) Brand New Brother
Opening lyric - "I want a brand new brother... I don't like the one I've got." It goes downhill from there. Some family issues to deal with here.
7.) Merry Christmas Bells
This is a lively tune - perfect commercial material for lottery tickets!
8.) A Letter To Santa
A kid "writes/recites" his letter to Santa for the first minute, then sings an emotional plea for world harmony & peace! Get me my vomit bucket, quick!
9.) Hymn For Christmas
A simple tune done very well. Possibly the most normal song on the whole album!
10.) Snow Ride
"Snowwww Rideeeeeee..." It starts out straight but ends up campy, complete with lyrics to snicker at!
11.) Reindeer Roundup
From note one, this country/cowboy flavored song is headshakingly strange... I LOVED IT!
12.) The Gift Of Christmas
WOW! This one's fantastic! Probably the best song off either lottery album! Great stuff!
13.) March Of The Toys
A Macy's Parade set to music... it's good, it's bad, it's campy, it's funny, it's causing my ears to bleed...
14.) Christmas In The City
Opening lyric - "Magical moment on a magical night, we're heading out to the big city lights." I prefer the country, thanks!
15.) Mr. Evergreen
A little girl sings to an evergreen tree her father planted... GREAT JUMPING ICEBERGS! This one must be heard to be believed... I'm wiping tears away...
16.) Christmas Is For Children (Reprise)
Just when you think you've reached the camp ceiling... LAFFIN SO HARD... can't... reach... the... STOP... button...
Whew... the Shatner mode wore off and the CD is over. I used to play "Tiny Tim's Christmas Album" to clear a room - this one might just do the same thing!
If you're brave enough, you can STILL download this album (as well as the first lottery album). Jeff, thanks for sharing these gems with us!
On to the next new Christmas CD in my collection...